The Psychology Of Compassion
Compassion is more like a light switch than a dial. It tends to flip fully on or fully off, and the cues that flip it are predictable. The same cues that flip it on can also flip it off when overdone.
Triggers
A single identifiable person. A clear, specific need. Visible vulnerability. Proximity (real or simulated). Perceived honesty.
Killers
Statistics about thousands of victims. Vague needs. Polished marketing. Demands rather than requests. Repeated exposure without action (compassion fatigue).
Practical implication
Asks that succeed mirror the trigger list almost item by item. Asks that fail usually have at least two items from the killer list.
Frequently asked questions
Can compassion be exhausted?
Yes. Compassion fatigue is well-documented, especially among healthcare workers and aid workers. The fix is not more compassion, it is rest.
Are some people just not compassionate?
Less than you would think. Most people respond to the right cues. The cues just have to be right.
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